The Reason of His Pain
by Ludicrous Legacy
Summary: A few months after Rido's attack, Rima wonders what's wrong with Shiki...my first fic ever! Please be gentle :D Rated T for safety. NOTE: I DO NOT OWN VK! ALL CREDITS GO TO MATSURI HINO! One-shot, basically fluff.


_Hey everyone! Thanks for the reviews, I'm glad you liked it =D ShiMa forever!!!!_

_Also, I forgot to mention this before, so: **I DO NOT OWN VAMPIRE KNIGHT, SHIKI SENRI OR TOUYA RIMA. **If it were up to me, they'd be together ON SCREEN, not just in my dreams...lol anyway, back to the fic =P_

Touya Rima's full lips twisted into a frown as she surveyed her best friend worriedly from her perch by the classroom window. Although Shiki Senri's face was pale and expressionless by nature, lately he had become more and more withdrawn, almost dejected, one might say. "But who am I to blame him?" She murmured quietly to herself. "Neither of us has truly been the same since Rido's attacks." She shivered slightly to herself as she recalled the way Shiki had tried to kill her, the look in his eyes, his cold, cruel laughter…. _No! _She thought viciously. _Not Shiki. Rido in Shiki's body. Yet the idea itself is just too painful…. _Her hands clenched into fists at her sides, and she had to bite down hard on her lip to stop herself from crying out. Taking several deep breaths to calm herself, she forced her mind back to the present. "Ne, Shiki." She called, hopping off the windowsill and walking over to his desk, seating herself on top of it. He was leaning back carelessly in his seat, staring at the ceiling moodily. Not that he had anything better to do, since—once again—no one in the Night Class had bothered to show up.

"What, Rima?" He asked in a monotone, without even looking at her.

Rima felt a certain unease creeping up her spine, but she shook it off impassively. "You've seemed down lately." She began hesitantly. With the old Shiki, she would've just jumped in and reprimanded him for being so moody. But there was no telling how this new Shiki would react. Her last words to him still echoed in her mind, the very words she knew would hit him hardest…

_You should love yourself more!_

She pushed the thought away scornfully. Shiki still hadn't even looked at her. "Shiki," She began again. "I was just wondering if—"

"I'm all right, Rima." He cut her off, still speaking in that bored tone. Though it stung her, she ignored his aloofness and reached for his arm, waiting for him to elaborate. When he said nothing, she gave his arm a shake. "Are you hungry?" She asked.

He finally turned to look at her, but his eyes were blazing angrily. "No." He said flatly, though Rima knew better. Pursing her lips, she extracted a pack of blood tablets from her skirt pocket and offered them to her friend. "I'll go get you some water." She made to get off the table, but Shiki held her back. "Stop it, Rima." He said. "I don't want any tablets."

Surprised, but reluctant to argue with him, she settled back into her place as he resumed his pointless staring at the ceiling. _What's bothering you, Senri? _She thought miserably. _What is it that's making you so distant, even to me, who knows you better than anyone…?_

No sooner had the thought occurred to her than another one began nagging at the base of her skull. _Could it be…he's thirsting for real blood? _She wondered. She glanced at his face again and was surprised to see the look of poignant hunger that lingered there, nonexistent mere seconds before. "Shiki…" She whispered, unable to complete the thought. He, for his part, ignored her.

Coming to a sudden decision, she slipped her school jacket off and began unbuttoning her black school blouse. "Here, Shiki." She said, pushing her pigtails away from her neck. "You can feed off me."

He stiffened visibly, but his voice remained unemotional. "No, Rima." He said, somewhat coldly. "I already told you, I'm not hungry."

"Shiki…." She protested, leaning closer to him. "It says so all over your face! There's no need to deny it! I'll give you all the blood you need, I promise!" Nothing. No response at all. It hurt her heart to see him like that. He looked so tense, so aggravated that she just longed to take him into her arms and hold him. Suddenly feeling desperate, she tugged harder at her collar and threw her head back, exposing the curved line of her neck far more. "Shiki, onegai!" She gasped. Yet even as she said it, she wasn't sure what she herself meant by it. Was it really out of concern for his wellbeing that she wanted this? Or was it simply her own greedy longing to feel his lips on her neck…?

Shiki stared at her exposed neck, eyes wide. "Rima…?" He gasped, a wild expression suddenly crossing his features. He licked his lips once, twice, running his tongue over smooth, perfect lips Rima longed to taste. "Rima?" He asked again, louder this time. His fangs were already bared in preparation to permeate her skin. She waited quietly, though the hand that rested on the desk was clenched tightly in preparation for the pain. He let out a long, agonized moan, plunging his face towards her neck with a snarl.

Rima shut her eyes and waiting numbly for the pain, but to her surprise, there was none. Shiki was still moaning, holding her so tightly that they both moved whenever one of them took a breath. So tightly, that she could feel every single curve of his body, every single rock-hard muscle that made him so popular at the agency…yet still he didn't bite.

It was only then she realized that he was sobbing.

"Shiki?" She murmured worriedly, but he couldn't reply. He had his face buried in her lap, shaking as he wept. His tears were hot against her skin, and his breath was coming out in serrated gasps. "Rima, hold me." He begged. "Onegai. Hold me."

Shocked, and somewhat frightened, Rima hastened to obey. For the first time in her life, she was seeing Shiki break down. She hadn't even known that it was possible. Even when they were children, Shiki was always the one to comfort _her _when she cried. He had always been her rock, the one person she knew she trusted, and loved unconditionally. He had always been her supporter, and her best friend. She needed him.

But she never could have guessed that the day would come when he needed her too….

"Senri. My dear, darling Senri." She crooned softly, stroking his hair as he fought to regain control. "What's going on?" She asked. "Tell me!"

"Ri…ma…!" Shiki moaned. "I…I can't! I can't do it!"

"Can't do _what_?" She asked. "What could possibly hurt you so much?"

"I can't…love myself!" He gasped, clutching at her waist for support. "I can't, Rima! I can't love what I am!" He let out another groan of frustration and hid his face in her lap again. "Gomen ne, Rima." He whispered. "Gomen ne."

She felt tears gather in her own eyes. "Senri…" She whispered wanting so badly to comfort him, yet she had no words to say. "Senri…" She tried again.

"Rima…." He looked up at her, his silver eyes bloodshot. "Rima, if I can't love myself…." He took her hands in his, pressing them to his face. "If I can't love myself, will you love me instead?"

She stared at him in shock, mind reeling. "N-n-nani?" She stammered. "Shiki, do you mean—?"

"Hai." He breathed, twisting his head so he was kissing the palm of her right hand. "Rima, become my lover." He said softly, his voice still husky from crying. "Rima, in loving you, I can love myself. Because you're a part of me."

Rima took his hand, placing it over her own heart. "Senri," She murmured, smiling slightly. "I have always loved you. Now, let me show you how much." Lifting her wrist to her mouth, she bit down hard into her own skin, letting the blood flow into her mouth. Tipping Shiki's head back, she pressed her lips to his, letting the warm, sticky liquid surge down his throat. To her surprise—and pleasure, if she was honest with herself—he didn't resist, but drank greedily. She filled her own mouth twice before he grew impatient and began to feed directly from the wound itself. It was only when he was completely satiated that he let go of her hand, but he pulled her in closer to kiss her lips again.

"Rima." He whispered hoarsely against her lips. "Thank you. Really."

"You're welcome." She replied. "I was glad to do it." She added, smiling softly. "Are you okay now?"

"Of course I am." He said, sliding his head down to rest in her lap again. Just then, the bell for the end of the Night Class rang, signaling their return to the dorms.

"Ne, Shiki." Rima murmured, stroking his hair softly. "Class is over. Shouldn't we head back to the dorm?"

"No." Shiki sighed, staying put. "I'd just like to stay like this for a while."

Rima's heart quivered with delight. "Of course." She whispered, toying with a strand of his gorgeous reddish-brown hair. "We can stay here as long as you want, Shiki.

…

I'll do anything for you…."

_**For Kudairo, with love **_**3**

* * *

ALLRIGHT! R&R please! This took a lot of effort on my part!


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